Do you feel it is safe to be you?
Judgement, comparison, criticism… feeling “I’m not enough” has become a worldwide epidemic.
We could argue that it’s always been, yet with the brand new bombardment of social pressures through hypnotic advertising and social media, more than ever we feel under scrutiny.
This mindset or belief is very real and frequently ‘life crippling’…
I see it with almost every client, in one way or another.
It comes in many forms; trust factors, self-worth UNawareness, loneliness, distorted body image, lack of purpose and so much more.
Whether this belief stems from childhood memories, a bully boss at work, a relationship or other… it takes one hell of a dollop of confidence to hold our head high throughout every day in our society.
For years I surrounded myself with people who wanted me to “change” or thought I needed to be “cured” or “fixed”.… insisting I lose weight… stop being so sensitive and too emotional… be less full on, more calm. It didn’t feel safe to be me, in fact it felt down right wrong – I believed them (I definitely needed to change – or so I thought).
During these times there was a constant tightness in my chest and kerfuffle in my head.
The anxiety of not feeling good enough or loveable was debilitating.
Relationships would fall apart and loneliness would kick in. Everyone else seemed to have their shit together, whilst my life was not going to plan.
I wanted to be accepted for being me. I wanted someone to love my ‘Fiona-isms’. I wanted to live without the feeling I should change to be more of something and less of something else… constantly “trying too hard”… OMG it was exhausting trying to be “perfect”!
Then one day I finally I realised that all pain I was feeling was brought on by ME! – not intentionally of course – HOWEVER, when you know your worth, you don’t take stuff that others throw at you so personally… and suddenly you don’t need constant validation or to ‘people please’… in order to be “acceptable”.
Now, I’m so proud to say I am happy being me.
Life will constantly throw us expectations and judgments from others…
The funny thing is, when you feel you are enough everyone around you relates that back to you.
That’s simply how universal energy works. Like attracts like.
When we radiate our “enough-ness”, life is so different and so much better.
Feeling enough is a by-product of self-love, which naturally leads to self-empowerment. Feeling in this vibe cannot help but positively impact, your relationships, your happiness levels, your confidence, your career, clarity and more!
It doesn’t matter what others think of you – it matters what you think of you – and after that… well, the world changes when you change.
I got a puppy for my recently. Have you ever stopped to observe a puppy? To soak in the unconditional love that they ooze so freely? To witness the innocence of their mistakes.. as they do their best yet still accidentally be a little naughty or supposedly “wrong”. Constantly learning so much about life from their mistakes; peeing on the carpet, eating your favourite pair of shoes or biting your nose whilst having fun. You see, of course, they are enough – perfectly enough, yet still with a lifetime of growth before them.
We don’t expect a puppy to know everything when they are newly born. Yet they are 100% enough and incredibly lovable from day one. Loving YOU along the way, and loving every moment in THEIR day.
Puppies do what they want to do, what they feel is best for them. Whilst constantly learning from their life experiences, as they become a more mature, grown up dog.
And while they are on their journey of growth, they don’t get down on themselves, they still know how to love and fully enjoy the now – WOW, could we actually learn a lot from a cute little puppy?!
JOY is their natural state, and in turn that is what they naturally give to others.
TIP – How to know YOU ARE ENOUGH:
Often, in our lives there’s often a bunch of stuff that is going pretty well and a few things not so great. As humans we tend to focus on the troubles, insecurities and worries rather that the good stuff. Which ultimately just makes the negative circumstances seem more cumbersome than need be. When we focus on anything we increase the vibration of the said ‘thing’ and in turn make it more intense and dominating in our life.
Often when we feel down on ourselves because we are comparing our flaws with others, we are oblivious to our own unique gifts. Once we open up and realise our own beauty and talent, and focus on that, we naturally enhance our innate awesomeness.
Our bodies and our feelings are a reflection of what we are thinking. For example: If we are carrying extra weight, perhaps we are weighing ourselves down with burdens and carrying around old stuff instead of shedding the past issues to make way for new beginnings.
Let go and focus on what you love and appreciate about yourself, people and your surroundings. Be grateful (even for the littlest things).
The trick is to get in the vibe of stuff that makes you feel good – do more of that.
Your life will mirror how you feel about yourself – know you are enough today, as you are… and your world will change. I did it – so can YOU.
YOU ARE ENOUGH.
You are the seed, blossoming into a beautiful flower… enjoy the process.
If you want to start on the journey to embracing this new mindset, read my blog “How to be responsible for your feelings and emotions”.
Enjoy your world,